Mazel Tov, Ken and Lauren
Funniest thing of the weekend: Digger and I signed the Ketubah (the Jewish marriage contract) as witnesses, in Hebrew and English. I spend way too much time practicing my signature in Hebrew, so I’d make sure I wrote it well. So the time comes, I step up to sign this simply gorgeous piece of art, and I’m so concerned about the pen slipping, leaving a jagged line across the contract of Ken and Lauren’s love, that I wind up signing really small. Really small.
During the ceremony, maybe fifteen minutes later, the rabbi reads the Ketubah. He gets to the end, and reads “This document was signed by two witnesses, Baruch ben Aryeh [Digger] and…”
There’s maybe a two second pause as he tries to resolve my scrawls into either a hebrew or an english name, failing on both counts.
“…a second witness.”
Apparently, I’m going to be known as “Second Witness” to Ken and Lauren for the rest of my life. sigh